The Toothbrush

from by REGI RKT

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this was written during cancer season if that gives u any context for how i handled my first truly honest, pure heartbreak at the adolescent age of queer 22



This morning is oppressive
It's all gray in the sky
I ask myself,
what's happening here?
It's the middle of July

Nobody is outside and the
Seagulls have gone quiet even the
Dog next door that usually wakes me has
Given up his riot

Only sound’s inside of my head
Hazily remembering what i did

It's all coming back to me now
I got home kind of drunk
I went to pee and as i sat
I saw your old toothbrush

I got it just for you so you'd feel home in my apartment
It's an interloper now, i thought
It quickly got symbolic

So i held it gently in my hands
Closed my eyes and threw it in the trash

And now the somber summer scene reflects the hour’s gravity
When i threw away that toothbrush
I distanced you from me
The silence of the earth seems so merciful and raw
Not to be a solipsist, but it all seems to line up

You made your move,
now I've made mine
Is this self care?
It feels divine

I'm usually one to leave things hanging
Over my head for a long time
I'm the yes-er and the pleaser
The co-captain of my life

Who thought i’d find autonomy in a dentally hygienic device?
It feels so dumb
It’s kind of nice


from Fanfiction, released July 21, 2017



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REGI RKT Portland, Maine

DIY anxiety bops from ur 2001 grrrl crush. punk is vulnerability is punk. loud Aquarius.

"pure Portland punk... Honest, raw, full of fury and irreproachable DIY spirit"
- Pretty Purgatory

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